An Apologetics

My French is rusty from two decades of no use, but I retain the use of some favorite words and phrases – one of which is “dialog de sourds”. 

Literally translated, this means “a conversation between deaf people.” 

But the deafness to which it refers is not a literal deafness. 

Rather, it is the kind of deafness which renders the hearer unable to process input other than his / her own.

In English we may say that people are “talking past each other” or “not connecting well.” I confess that I prefer the snarky undertone of the French idiom, because it points to the fundamental truth about most of our communicational lapses: we don’t want to hear what the other person has to say.

The prophet Jeremiah laments, “To whom shall I speak and give warning, that they may hear? See, their ears are closed; they cannot listen. The word of the Lord is to them an object of scorn; they take no pleasure in it.” (6:10) 

Later, Isaiah describes a faithless person in terms of chosen blindness and deafness: “He sees many things, but he does not observe them; his ears are open, but he does not hear.” (42:20) 

Jesus amplifies this definition of faithlessness in rebuking the Pharisees who attempt to deny a miracle of healing in John 9: “Some of the Pharisees… said to him, ‘Surely we are not blind, are we?’  Jesus said to them, ‘If you were blind, you would not have sin. But now that you say, ‘We see,’ your sin remains.’”

Jesus and the Deaf

Jesus healed deaf people. 

His miraculous touch opened their ears in the same way that it opened the eyes of the blind, cleansed the skin of lepers, and brought paralyzed people to exuberant standing positions. 

Physical deafness was never an obstacle to Jesus.

But the kind of deafness alluded to in dialog de sourds? Jesus was frustrated and stymied by it, multiple times.

When unpacking the Parable of the Sower to His disciples in Matthew 13:14 – 16, He said,

With them indeed is fulfilled the prophecy of Isaiah that says:

‘You will indeed listen but never understand,
    and you will indeed look but never perceive.
For this people’s heart has grown dull,
    and their ears are hard of hearing,
        and they have shut their eyes,
        so that they might not look with their eyes,
    and hear with their ears
and understand with their heart and turn—
    and I would heal them.’

But blessed are your eyes, for they see, and your ears, for they hear. Truly I tell you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see but did not see it and to hear what you hear but did not hear it.

In the gospel of Mark, Jesus precedes this teaching of His disciples with an admonition to the listening crowd: “If you have ears to hear, then hear!” (Mark 4:9) 

Indeed, Jesus implies several times that authentic hearing is more of an intellectual and emotional commitment than it is a physical ability, and He ties authentic hearing to response. 

True hearing, according to Jesus, leads inexorably to action… and hearing without responsive action leads inexorably to ruin.

“Everyone who hears these words of mine and does not act on them will be like a foolish man who built his house on sand.” 

(Matthew 7:26)

Jesus’s litany of accusations at the Pharisees in Matthew 23 employs the metaphor of blindness but describes the sin of hearing without acting: 

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you tithe mint, dill, and cumin and have neglected the weightier matters of the law: justice and mercy and faith. It is these you ought to have practiced without neglecting the others.  You blind guides! You strain out a gnat but swallow a camel!”

(23:23 – 24)

The origins of the secular proverb that “actions speak louder than words” are therefore deeply theological. 

Conversely, indulging in a dialog de sourds can be a matter of sin.

An Age of Outrage

I frequently think “dialog de sourds” when reading the news. 

Willful deafness seems to be a prerequisite for public life in our days. 

To listen to an opponent’s point of view somehow equates to weakness; to shout down an opponent preemptively somehow equates to strength.

I wonder what it says about our confidence in our own correctness that we don’t trust it enough to test it against its rivals?

“Iron sharpens iron, and one person sharpens the wits of another,” declares Proverbs 27:17 – tacitly commending friction as the most effective wit-strengthening strategy.

Which begs the questions: 

In our siloed echo chambers of self-affirmation, are we increasingly witless? 

In our public square shouting matches and reciprocal labeling, are we ever weaker not just as a civilization but as thinking individuals?

Proverbs 18:2 declares, “A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing personal opinion.” Do our ceaseless expressions of (strong) personal opinions make us fools?

Let’s be honest: the friction most often on display in our culture is the oil-and-water type, mutually and reciprocally repellent.

“Cancel culture” and “silencing” are logical extensions of a posture of hermetically sealed self-righteous certainty; those with whom we disagree must become those whom we vilify and label. 

And the phenomenon of “haters” (those whose difference of opinion renders them inherently “hateful”) linguistically locks in the dehumanizing process of absolute difference.

But when we categorize the world solely in terms of who is “with us” and who is “against us”, enmity becomes a default position. 

This perpetuates the cycle of estrangement and deafness, because enmity is the opposite of empathy. And empathy is a requirement for two-way communication.

Empathy

Great communicators down the ages have known and demonstrated that the ability to argue persuasively begins with empathy. 

People listen to people who seem to have listened to them. Further, people like people who seem to like them, and “liking” leads to listening and to leaning in and (sometimes) even to learning from.

You hear it in the best preachers – the personal story or anecdote that connects an obscure principle with a common experience. 

You hear it in the most effective political speeches – the ability to connect individual lives to larger perspectives and grand ideas.

Politicians, preachers, professional communicators of all stripes know that they can only change a mind whose owner feels heard… and that an intellectual shift most often follows an emotional one.

Jesus demonstrates these truths in his template for ministry. He teaches those people whom He has already healed and fed. He speaks into the lives of outcasts whom He has already encouraged by making them His inner circle. And He points to His miraculous ministrations as evidence of His anointed insight and authority.

When the disciples of John the Baptist question Him about whether He is, in fact, the Messiah, Jesus responds,

“Go and tell John what you have seen and heard: the blind receive their sight; the lame walk; those with a skin disease are cleansed; the deaf hear; the dead are raised; the poor have good news brought to them.  And blessed is anyone who takes no offense at me.”

(Luke 7:22 – 23)

Jesus answers a question about His identity with a list of demonstrative actions – the ultimate illustration of “actions speaking louder than words”, as displayed in the Logos!

“People don’t care what you think until they know that you care.” That cliché remains relevant because it is rooted in the example of the One whose care and thoughts are our most desperate need.

Hearing… and doing

We all have ample opportunities, every day, to get outraged by those whose differences offend our sensibilities. And sometimes outrage is appropriate – God is outraged by attitudes and behavior that exploit or deceive those created in His image. But before we give anger access to our hearts or minds (or mouths!), we should measure it against God’s standards: 

Is this something that matters to God? 

If it is, how can I glorify God in my response to it?

Jesus, who prayed for the people who murdered Him while they were murdering Him, is our template for right reaction under intense pressure.

Jesus, who listened attentively to the spoken words and even the thoughts of those who reviled Him and persecuted Him, is our template for empathy toward wholly unsympathetic others.

And Jesus, who pointed to His actions as evidence of His character, is our template for living in such a way that our words have credibility to any who choose to hear them.

“Little children, let us love not in word or speech but in truth and action.”

(1 John 3:18) 

Even today – especially today – the love of Jesus is the Light in our present darkness and the Hope in our present despair. 

Even today – especially today – we must live in such a way that they will know we are Christians by our love. (John 13:35)